Unwrap Your Money Story: Why You Spend the Way You Do & How to Change It | Coffee With E

Have you ever stopped to ask why you spend the way you do?

In this episode of Coffee with E, we’re unpacking something most people never slow down long enough to face, your money story. The beliefs, habits, silence, and experiences around money that quietly shape your financial decisions today.

I share my own story, growing up in a home where money wasn’t talked about, going to college on a scholarship, being handed credit cards and financial aid with zero education, and making money mistakes that followed me straight into adulthood.
This episode is not about shame.
It’s about awareness.

We talk about:

• How childhood silence around money creates adult spending habits
• Why “having access” to money doesn’t mean you’re ready for it
• Credit cards, college debt, and impulse spending
• Learning to say no today so you can say yes tomorrow
• Why non-traumatic experiences can still shape your future
• Asking: What would my future self thank me for?
• The difference between being able to buy something and being able to afford it
• How journaling your money story leads to freedom, not guilt

This conversation is for the woman who:

• Feels behind financially
• Wonders why discipline feels harder than it should
• Grew up without money conversations
• Wants financial peace, not just financial things
• Is tired of repeating patterns she doesn’t understand

☕ Your Assignment:
Sit with your money story.
Write it out.
Ask questions — of yourself, your parents, your past.
Not to fix it yet… just to understand it.
Because debt isn’t just financial, it’s emotional, relational, and generational.
And financial wholeness works the same way.

✨ Big News:
This episode connects directly to my upcoming guided journal + companion workbook, designed to help you uncover your money story and walk toward true financial wholeness, from the inside out.

If this conversation resonated with you, subscribe, grab your coffee, and meet me back here. We’re doing this together.

Follow Us for More Inspiration:

📸 Instagram: @erica.rawls
🎥 YouTube: Erica Rawls
📧 For inquiries and collaborations: customercare@ericarawls.com

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Transcript

Why Your Money Story Matters

Erica Rawls 0:00

So before we start talking about budgets and spreadsheets and how to save money, we have to talk about you because what you don't hear a lot of times in financial circles is the conversation about what is your money story. And it's important to unwrap it, and here's why. Because unwrapping it is actually going to give you a baseline. A baseline to understanding why the way you spend is the way you spend. So I think that's a great starting point. A lot of us miss. So I want to share my story. So for some people, you know, you you grew up with money. Some people, you're making it in spite of. And then there's people like me. I grew up in a household where money wasn't really talked about. Good or bad, it just wasn't talked about. Or at least I didn't hear, because anyone that knows me knows I only listen to the things that I think are necessary in the moment. So they may have talked about it and it just went right over my head. So I want to give my parents some credit. This is not about the way they raised me. It's about what I remember as a growing up as a child. And money matters were just mute. It was like that cousin that never showed up and we never talked about, right? So I know that we had money and I feel as though that we had a lot of it, or at least enough that I never had to worry about a thing. Meals, clothes. As a matter of fact, I'm a little princess because I believe that they raised me to be one. So there's that. So I want to take you back a little bit, probably give you my age. I remember us being the people or the family that had in television. Do y'all remember that in television? It's that console game, um, and also Nintendo and Mario Kort and all the things. We had that. And I also remember being the person that had the stereo system. I'm talking the DVDs, we had either speakers, I had the sound system that's top-notch when I went to college. So my room was the room that everybody went to to listen to music just to hang out, because it was a whole vibe, right? So that's all well and good, but let me share something with you. Because I never really understood how money worked, I went to school on a scholarship. Let me share this with you. And you know what? No judgment, okay, Luxis, you're not allowed to judge. I want to share this with you so that hopefully there's a learning experience for someone in here somewhere. So I went to school on a scholarship. And even though I had that scholarship, the first thing that happens when you walk on campus, what is it? Anyone that goes to college knows this. You get attacked by these people that want to give you a credit card. They want to sell you on the opportunity and the reasons why you should have a credit card. So, of course, yeah, I filled one out. I fill out the application, and you automatically get this credit. Like, great. But giving credit to students that don't know anything about how to pay it back or that you may not even know that you have to pay it back, that's a dangerous place to be. And honestly, shame on them for even making that um us their target market. But it worked. I found out that 57% of the students that actually go to college, they get these credit cards and they go in debt. Did you know that? Yes, at least like $2,000 to $5,000 in debt. So there's that. So not only do you have your student loans for most people. In my case, I had a scholarship, so I didn't. More on that in a second. You also have consumer debt. Now, let's talk about financial aid. Now, remember I told you I had this scholarship? Well, we had an opportunity to fill out to get financial aid. First of all, why was I even presented with the opportunity for financial aid beyond me? Now remember, I'm just sharing you how I had to unwrap my story, and this is why it's important for you to do the same so you understand what your spending habits are. So I digress and we'll go back into my story. I literally applied for financial aid. And do you not know I got money? Now, at the time, I think it was $10,000. So imagine an 18-year-old having $10,000 to do whatever they wanted to do. Because remember, a full scholarship means your dorms paid for, your textbooks are paid for, your meals are paid for. The only thing you have to worry about is just waking up in the morning and going to class. That's it. Not me, because I'm a princess. And remember, I was used to getting everything I wanted for the most part. There's some stipulations there, but for the most part, I got what I wanted. And I spent that money. You want to know what I spent it on? You guessed it. On clothes, on things that didn't matter. I accumulated debt to show off with my friends. I even had the nerve to buy a gift for one of my male friends that I wanted to impress. Good Lord, that's so embarrassing. You know what? Throw me under the bridge into the water. That is some crazy stuff. Who does that? I did. And I'm sure there's some other people that can relate. It may not have been a uh financial aid or credit cards, but I'm sure there's someone that can relate because I thought it was so important to have money and not even understanding I had to pay it back. So that is my money story. And it's kind of crazy to understand because it actually led into adulthood. So after school, I realized I had to pay those loans back. Now I had a great job. I worked in a county firm and I was able to pay off, you know, the majority of all that debt. Um, honestly, to this day, if I'm being honest, there's still some lingering debts that are floating around because of that dumb mistake. So the lesson in that is you really have to understand what you're doing when it comes to spending money because it's it will haunt you down the road and it will hinder hinder your ability to make decisions in the long run. So just think about that. So no one ever taught me that just because you can, that you should. And that's an

Break The Silence And Ask Questions

Speaker 6:09

important part to remember because there's going to be a lot of times you're going to be in situations where you actually can apply for a credit card and you will actually get it. Doesn't mean you should. So I'm going to be the auntie, okay, that enjoys the fine things just like you, that's going to share something with you. Do not get a credit card unless you understand and have a plan, strategic plan to actually pay it off. Because what you don't want to do is to purchase something now that you're going to regret later, even if it's just in the moment. And I just heard literally with my teen, we were talking about this a little bit. And one of the things that one of my teammates said to me was a lot of times we have to learn how to um defer what we want and learn how to say no today so that we can say yes tomorrow. I was like, you know what? You're learning something. And I love that. And that's so true. You have to say no today in order for you to say yes tomorrow. And a lot of people, when it comes to consumer debt, a lot of them weren't able to say no in that moment. So trust me, you're not behind just because you don't have what

Journal To Find Your Patterns

You’re Not Alone In Debt

Subscribe And New Journal Announcement

Financial Wholeness Beyond Dollars

Erica Rawls 7:16

you want in the moment. I get it. Again, I'm a princess. I want what I want when I want it. However, learning the discipline to be able to purchase something when you can afford it is where you want to go. And the other thing, too, just because something's not traumatic doesn't mean it's significant. Hear what I'm saying. So my story wasn't traumatic, but it was significant enough that it made an impact in my future. And if anything, I learned from that experience is you really got to ask yourself this question. What would my future me thank me for? Or would this decision I'm making today allow for my future me to say, you know what, job well done? And if you can answer yes to that, then maybe yeah, go ahead and make that purchase. But just know that's something that you have to consider. Now let's talk, go back to being silent. Remember, I came from a household where I believe that silence was something that it existed when it comes to money matters. And silence actually allows you to create your own narratives, your own stories. So don't be like me, because sometimes I give myself my side eye to my younger self. Don't be like me and not ask questions to your parents. You may be 25, you may be in your 30s. It's still not too late to ask your parents, hey, so how are you able to afford these things? Did you budget? And if so, what does budgeting look like for you? Doing that is going to help you out tremendously. So the first part of your journey of unwrapping your story is not to fix it. A lot of people think when I'm having this conversation with them that they have to fix something. No, just really get an understanding of what your story means to you. Taking a look behind the curtain, that takes courage. Like it really does. And how do you do that? Well, for me, what I did, I literally journaled. I journaled everything I possibly could about how I knew money and how I grew up with money and what it meant to me. What does money mean to me now? And how can I change that? The how can I change that didn't happen until I actually sat with my money story. Now, the money story that you're going to learn about yourself, that's not to shame you, that's not to criticize you, that's not to do anything other than to uncover your habits, why you do what you do when you do them. And once you do that, then you'll be ready for the next step, but not until you actually sit down and think about it. Doing so is going to allow you to be free. And it also is going to allow conversations with your parents if you still have the ability to talk to them about your money story. Like, hey, you know what I uncovered? It's probably going to build your relationship even more. And then I take it even further. Share with your friends. Share with your friends what you had uncovered and see if they can relate. Because a lot of times when you bring something to someone's attention, you understand that, yep, mm-hmm, yep, that sounds just like me. And then you are walking in solidarity to uncover how we can fix this. So that's my assignment for you is to uncover your money story. And once you uncover your money story, then you want to come back here and we're going to learn how we can actually overcome what you think might be an issue or a challenge. Because it's probably not. We all live through it. We all make mistakes. We all make money mistakes. Because if you think about it, there's a lot of consumers. I want to put a statistics in this the next time that we actually get back together. Because I think it's important for you to understand. So in college, I know that 57% of the students actually incur some debt. But what is the overall woman, ages 25 to 35? Like, what's the consumer debt there? Wouldn't that be good to know? I promise you, you're not alone. And we're going to walk this together. And I can't wait to have the next conversation with you. After you unwrap your money story, meet me back here. Oh, wait, you know what? I forgot to tell you or ask you. If you like this conversation, you like this content, I need you to do me a favor, subscribe, because all you're going to do is have coffee with me, right? Because you're a luxe girl like me and you're looking for a way to live the life that you truly want to live, and most of all, to afford it. I have some good news to share with you, some exciting news, actually. So this money story that we're talking about, well, there's a reason why I'm talking about it because we are actually in the process of releasing my first written authored book. It's actually a journal, and I have a companion guide as well that's going to be releasing. So the recording of this, the release date is set to be March 6th. In this journal, you're going to find prompts, some great questions in order for you to get you through to financial wholeness. There's going to be some questions that are going to challenge you. There's going to be some questions that you're going to love. There's going to be some questions like, girl, why are you asking me this? Because I had to say the same thing to myself, okay? But you're going to love it. At the end of the journey, you're going to be financially whole. Because a lot of people don't know that debt isn't just financial, it's emotional, relational, and generational. And the same thing goes with financial wholeness. It's not just financial, it's emotional, relational, and generational. And that's what I want for you to get a full picture of what financial wholeness is so that you can find the life that you truly want to live.