Stop Saying Sorry: How Women Step Into Leadership Before They’re Ready | Coffee With E

You know you’re capable but something keeps holding you back.
That quiet voice saying you’re “not ready,” “not qualified,” or “not worthy yet.”
In this powerful episode of Coffee with E., I sit down with Mary Oliveira, CEO of the Whitaker Center, and Amy Rote, CEO of Big Brothers Big Sisters of South Central PA, for a real, unfiltered conversation about stepping into leadership before you feel ready and why that’s often exactly the right time.

We talk about:
- Why women over-apologize and how it undermines confidence
- How to lead without asking permission
- Why vulnerability is a leadership superpower
- Letting go of “work-life balance” and choosing harmony instead
- Finding (and evolving) your purpose at every stage of life
- Saying yes because you can even when you’re afraid

This episode is mentorship, truth, and encouragement wrapped into one coffee-fueled conversation. If you’ve ever hesitated to go after an opportunity, minimized your voice in a room, or felt like you had to prove you belong, this one’s for you.

☕ Your assignment:
If this conversation filled you up, share it with another woman who needs to hear it. We grow stronger when we grow together.

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Transcript

Setting The Table: Confidence And Worth

Erica Rawls 0:00

You know that you are capable of doing a job, but for whatever reason, the feeling of less than or not worthy of just make you not take it. I sit down with Mary Oliveira, CEO of the Whitaker Center, and also Amy Rhodes, who is the CEO of Big Brothers and Big Sisters. They actually break it down in such a way that you're gonna feel empowered and you're gonna wanna go after that position that you felt that you weren't worthy of, even if you feel like you were not ready. And that leads me to today's roast. I need for every last one of you to stop saying sorry. Why is it that we as women feel as though before we start any sentence or if we feel guilty or we're not able to do something that we believe that we're expected to do, the first thing that comes to mind is we have to apologize for it. I believe when someone says sorry, it's because of a lack of self-confidence. You owe no one an apology. Very rarely should you be using that word in your profession, even with your family or with your friends. If you don't feel like doing a thing, sorry, I can't, don't say sorry. Did you see that? It was just so impromptu. You don't say sorry, I can't do it. Just say, I'm not available. Or a colleague says, hey, I want to need this report done. I'm not available. How about I can get it done on this day instead? Or that deadline seems a little tight. How about we stretch it or extend it for this time frame? Do you see how that works? This is the capacity that I have. This is the framework in which I can work in. This is the timeline that I have available. Totally different. You are leading. Sit back and get ready to listen to two dynamic CEOs because they break it all down for you and it's good. Mary, I mean, just to have you in my chair taking time out of your busy schedule to have coffee with me, I am just honored. Like seriously.

SPEAKER_00 1:52

Well, girl talk and coffee, it's my love language, it's right there. Thank you for having me.

Saying Yes Before You’re Ready

Erica Rawls 1:56

Oh, I know. So I was excited just when we hung up over our brewing of ideas. And the one thing that stuck out to me was we talked about um getting into leadership before feeling ready, you know, through like the whole process of mentorship and even that self-trust. So I wanted to talk to you all about that because I think it's important for the audience, the community that we're building here on Coffee with E. Let's mentor them a little bit. Let's give them that mentorship we wish we had when we're growing up. Okay. So what was it that allowed you to take on leadership before you were even comfortable saying yes? Like what made you say yes?

SPEAKER_00 2:39

Well, I think for me, it definitely started in childhood, oldest daughter syndrome. So you know right there, you either have or you take the mantle of responsibility for everyone else onto your shoulders. And um, my, you know, younger siblings would probably say, I put myself in the leadership role to boss them around in the as mom number two. Um, sometimes it was out of necessity, you know. And so it just became ingrained very early on in childhood of just kind of stepping in. Uh, and I don't even think I was aware of it when I did it. Um, and you know, fast forward, we already talked about how many decades we share, we don't need that for the camera. But it's it's in this, you know, continuum and being blessed with um a fantastic career pathway that's had its ups and downs, bumps and bruises and curves, certainly, but um, you know, definitely has transcended to be a great and reflection journey. And I landed on this phrase um in an earlier conversation this year that I did with with another um friend, and I said, you know why? I said yes, because I can.

Erica Rawls 3:46

I love that.

SPEAKER_00 3:47

And that has become my tagline. Why am I a leader? Because I can.

Erica Rawls 3:52

Yes, I can be.

SPEAKER_00 3:53

Why did I say yes? Because I can. Why am I afraid? Because I can be afraid, but it doesn't stop me from still stepping out and stepping up.

Erica Rawls 4:02

So I love that. So you said, look, I'm going for it. Yep. Afraid or not. Afraid or not. When you do it afraid, I feel like that's when the adrenaline I can't even say adrenaline starts pumping, right? And then you're just like, okay, it's like do or die. Yeah. Right? Yeah. And I'll be darned if I'm going to be the one looking like a clown, right? So it's just like I'm gonna do everything possible. If it means staying up late at night, right? Trying to figure it all out, or even tapping on the shoulders of someone, either that maybe that um was there before you, or that you can confide in, right? I think that that is one thing that um a lot of people are afraid to do. So yeah, Amy, I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 4:43

So I'm on the opposite. I am the youngest out of the family. Oh, really? So for me, I've always stepped up in leadership roles, but I was on the opposite. Being the youngest, I always felt a little bit like, sorry, being an older sister is a little empowering, you know. And I'm like, my voice matters, listen to me. Yeah, and uh so I felt like I was often shouting from the rooftops of, you know, a little sister, but I'm here and I want to leave. Look at me, look at me, and look at me. And uh one thing that I learned throughout my career, like my leadership journey is very evolutionary because it it every stage of my life and my career, I've had to evolve and adapt, adapt to um the opportunities that came to me. I mean, I started my career as a certified therapeutic recreation specialist, and I know the viewers have no idea what that is.

Erica Rawls 5:43

You said therapeutic.

SPEAKER_02 5:44

That's all I needed to know.

SPEAKER_00 5:45

Yeah, we've got the candle, the coffee, the city. Yes, right.

Mentors, Words, And Finding Flow

SPEAKER_02 5:49

I have always started out with in every part of my career helping others and being that servant leader. But you know, when you when you asked what was it that made you step up to lead, um, every stage of my career I've had to be brave and make decisions that I knew in that situation it was the best for me. Um and you know, I moved into the CEO role at Big Brothers Big Sisters during a pandemic with a lot of changes. It was the great resignation. Uh, our leadership team pretty much all left except myself. And uh here I am, um, you know, families, kids, our programming, our staff's families all relied on me to step up and say, I'm gonna lead this ship because too many people um depend on us. And uh it took a lot of internal self-talk, affirmation.

Erica Rawls 6:47

So I was gonna ask you, so would you I can?

SPEAKER_02 6:49

Yes, I'm going to do it because I know I can and I'm the right one to lead this ship. Um but you know, I had to make sure that my voice was heard. And as a little girl, being the this the youngest in the family, uh, I had to learn really at an early age that no matter what leadership role I took, I needed to make sure my voice was being heard.

Erica Rawls 7:15

Yeah. So then what type, okay, so for the person that feels as though that you have to go into the room and just be like, okay, I'm the leader, right? Because I see it all the time with our our our our our young, powerful, ambitious go-getters, women, especially when there's a room full of men. We feel like, okay, we have to show these men we know how to do it. So can you give us your secret and how you manage in rooms, how you use your influence? You know, what does that look like? Because I think that's important for today's society. Um for a couple of reasons. One, Gen Zs are gonna, they can't take that anymore. You can't do that anymore, right? They're just gonna walk out like, okay, forget this. I feel disrespected. Right. So can you walk us through that? Like, what does that look like for the two of you?

SPEAKER_00 8:08

I think um I've stumbled, you know, um uh definitely along the way, always wanting to learn. So we talked earlier um about mentoring, you know, and wanting to be the generation of professional female leaders that's constantly reaching behind to pull the next gen up. And I don't know that we got that as much, especially in the middle part of our career. So I turned to mentors. I had an amazing mentor with Miss Vera Cornish, um, may she rest in peace. And Vera taught me to find my words. You know, Vera was very big about words, you know, what is your word? And similarly, as uh a female in a leadership role, first in finance and then in state politics, working for the PA chamber, very male-dominated industries, um, raising children, having a husband, and you know, just all of it, all of the things that we're constantly juggling and still feeling like it's not enough. And uh she said, What is your word? How are you gonna focus on one word that will allow you to get it done? And when you can't, you can't, and it was flow. What does flow look like and feel like as a female leader? Um, so I go against the grain of a lot of those boilerplate phrases. Work-life balance to me has never been a part of my phraseology. Balance implies 50-50. I mean it's yeah, no, exactly. That's I want to hear everyone talk about it. Oh, I'm gonna tell you how to achieve work-life balance. It doesn't happen in this world and time because it's never just like this, you know. So I found flow. If I was doing some volunteering in the community, I took my, you know, 12-year-old son and my eight-year-old daughter, and I was on the board of Girls on the Run from the Capitol region, and they volunteered at, you know, the 5K race. And um, you know, if they had their sporting events, I went into work a little early and I left at 3 o'clock to get to that soccer game, that track meet, that swimming thing. It how it flowed together created more harmony, not balance. And so being able to feel confident as a professional woman that I wanted to pursue this career, but another very significant part of who I am is a wife and a mother. And they don't have to be at odds with each other if they're flowing together and they're harmonious. Yes. So it's those words.

Harmony Over Balance At Work And Home

Erica Rawls 10:32

This is so good. Okay, so harmony. I remember that. That's it right now. So, okay, look, did you hear what she said, y'all? For all the young ladies out there that's trying to balance it all, figuring out like work-life balance, it doesn't exist. Okay. So what Amy or Mary, good Lord, I want to hear Amy. Mary was saying, let's instead figure out how we can get harmony. Figure out how we can flow. Yeah, absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 10:58

The husband has to make dinner because I have to go to an event.

Erica Rawls 11:01

The husband needs to make dinner something. Not needs, okay.

SPEAKER_00 11:03

Should like to offer.

Erica Rawls 11:05

Correct.

SPEAKER_00 11:06

Correct. To make dinner.

Erica Rawls 11:07

And I'm just hot dogs and beans.

SPEAKER_00 11:09

And then it usually had less broccoli than mom's dinner, so the kids did not mind. They were very harmonious with dad's dinners when mom had to go to an event.

SPEAKER_02 11:19

So good. So good. You know, in my life, having three daughters, I am uh a wife, a mother, you know. And it is making sure that you're present and you're mindful and present in each of those moments. Um, you asked, so for me, I I didn't come really from a male-dominated my career has been in healthcare. So it's a lot of women. Oh, that's true. Um, you know, so we I feel like I've had women that has lifted me up uh throughout. But mentorship, I've sought out a mentor every every um stage of my professional career. And I think that that's really important for women that are listening to think about who do you align with? What is your core values? And and it's not just about looking at a bio in LinkedIn and saying this person should be my mentor, but does your values align and seek out for them? And I also wanted to say like one thing that I have learned. I used to think in my younger years um that vulnerabil being vulnerable and vulnerability was a negative thing. Superpower. And it is, it is my superpower. You ask how I lead the organization, and and when um I saw this year at Harrisburg simply the best that um we were nominated for the best place to work under 50. That meant so much to me because I know my staff was down there pressing that button over and over and over again. You know, there's only 30 of us. So to get that honor, they had to have been voting like every day. But I believe that um our successes and and myself as a leader has been because I know that it's okay to be vulnerable. Um, it's okay to know that uh your staff can see you vulnerable. Um, what's important is that they see that you take action with that vulnerability and that you allow them to come to you and and share their feelings and thoughts. The work we do is very heavy, and um our families are dealing with a lot of trauma and uh a lot of hardship, and our our staff are the ones that are working with them to build them up, to build their resilience. Well, they need that from me as a leader.

SPEAKER_03 13:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 13:37

And um, you know, so I think it's important for the viewers to know that vulnerability is a superpower, it is a strength, and it's how you use your vulnerability to lead.

Vulnerability As A Leadership Superpower

Erica Rawls 13:48

And I think it's really important too for us too in our generation. We saw both ends of the spectrum, don't you think? Like, so starting out in corporate, you know, working for a big five um accounting firm, and it was just like you go in there, you know, you put on your big girl face, right? And almost feeling like you had to act like tough. Yeah, and you were unfazed by it, you had no emotions basically. It was a human briefcase. You're a human freaking briefcase. You're like, what in the world is this? So then you go home and you're kicking and screaming and bussing at the husband, like, this is ridiculous. And do you know what they did? And anything they can say, whatever, right? So from going from that point to, hey, guess what, y'all? I'm not having my best day, right? So if I snap or if I say something that may not feel like, oh, okay, she's not in a good place, just know it's not you, right? And um, just being able to say, hey, I'm not having a good day, or I'm just like not in a good place, or I may need a mental health day. That's like a breath of fresh air that I think that we all may not understand how fortunate we are when it comes to those things because it I think it is important. It really is important.

SPEAKER_02 15:02

I think women often look for that professionalism. I mean, I you know, I don't like to fail. And to be a good leader, you have to be able to fail.

Erica Rawls 15:11

Fail forward. I say it all the time.

SPEAKER_02 15:13

Yeah, and um it it's important to really step back and reflect and know how much you are succeeding, even when you have a hurdle that um may not be you may not be able to walk over.

Erica Rawls 15:27

Yeah, yeah, that is so good. I say it all the time. So um going to be releasing a journal, it's a financial wholeness journal, not necessarily on leadership, but just how to, it's literally guiding women to um live their best lives and afford it, right? And one of the things I say as women, ambitious go-getters, you know, the community that we're building here, we have a hard time stopping and looking back at what we did and they're just bragging on ourselves. Right. Because we're so ambitious. Okay, we got this done. Check, let's go on to the next one. So to hear you say that is like ding ding ding, nails on the chalkboard, not nails on the chalkboard, uh, good lord, what is going on today? But just excited confetti, right? Yes. Um, that is just allows us to just stop, exhale, and just be like, okay, yeah, you are doing the darn thing. Okay, moving on to the next thing. Otherwise, you just feel like we're not where we're supposed to be, we're behind or whatever. So yeah, it's just one of those things.

SPEAKER_02 16:28

I think it was important for me when I be became a CEO in 2021. I've been only doing this five years, even though you know my my career journey is very long. I learned uh I learned to make sure that the staff didn't use certain words like, we're gonna get there. I know we're gonna get there, Amy. And I I I used to say, wait, where is there? Where's your milestone? What are you looking to achieve? What exactly is that? Because you, you know, look at what you've done, look at what you've accomplished. And and yes, we set goals and we we're gonna continue to move forward. But if you're if you're leading a team that feels like they're always churning to get somewhere that's unreachable, yeah, that's when burnout for women happen because they feel like they're not doing enough.

Erica Rawls 17:17

Yeah, that's so good. So, what are some things you had to unlearn in order to be successful?

Celebrate Wins And Define “There”

SPEAKER_00 17:24

How much time do we have to um I think one of my biggest lessons as I've moved up the ladder, so to speak, you know, in in C-suite, which um started in 2020 to get me to a CEO role in 2023, um was actually learning how to slow down. So to your point earlier, where it's that you know, I've got to do more, I've got to do next, I've got to get to, you know, A, B, C, D, and I've accomplished this. What's next on the list? And just practicing the pause, you know. Um, literally, figuratively, if it is that, you know, deep belly breathing that they say, you know, you might not have 45 minutes for a yoga class, but you have 45 one-minute times during the day to take a deep breath. Yeah. And it has probably the same, if not better, effects on your body, you know, if you can find that one minute to just stop and breathe. Um, so practicing the pause and it really is holistic in a lot of things. Pausing in my normal abundance of wanting to contribute. So two ears and one mouth, another mentor shared with me, have two ears and one mouth for a reason. So you should listen and hear twice as much as you say.

SPEAKER_03 18:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 18:34

And you need to understand in what circumstances you do that. Um, and my natural inclination is to want to jump in and solution and solve and take care of the older sister syndrome. It is, it's that older sister syndrome at a Virgo to boot, and you've got a ticking time bomb on your hands. Um, and so being very intentional about pausing, and my husband is great at helping me do this, typically when he's on the receiving end of one of my rants, like just step back, step back for a moment. Um, and so that goes against my natural inclinations. But as a lifelong learner and my strength finders, I always want to keep growing and doing and learning. Um so practicing the pause is an intentionality. And I would say the other thing, and this just reminded me when you asked this question of a situation I was in last week at a community event with a young professional who I admire, hold, and high regard. She's a new mom, working mom, so figuring out the flow. And her first thing after a quick hug, haven't seen you in a while, was, I'm so sorry. I said, Why? Why are you sorry? She said, Well, I know we've been trying to get a meeting on the calendar. She's a seven month old child and she's back at work.

Erica Rawls 19:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 19:51

And I said, if there's one thing I can do for this next generation, where's the camera? For this next generation of females, leaders, professionals, anything. Erase the word sorry from your vocabulary, chop it up and put it on the floor. Unless you intentionally caused harm to another human being for no good reason, and there maybe is a handful of good reasons to intentionally have harm done, there's nothing to be sorry for.

Erica Rawls 20:15

There's nothing to be sorry for. There's nothing to be don't put it in an email, don't put it in a text, don't say it over the phone.

SPEAKER_00 20:21

Because you're diminishing yourself with that word and you're giving people permission to do the same thing. So those are two things that I have had to really and continue to work on.

Erica Rawls 20:31

That is so good. And it's so hard for women not to. Literally, when I hear someone say sorry, don't say sorry. Yeah. Don't say sorry. Own your value.

Unlearning: Practicing The Pause

SPEAKER_00 20:38

We had a swear jar at work. Yeah. Um, and I actually took the swear jar label. Is that what you're saying? I did not know that about you, Mary. And it's now the sorry jar because I have a lot of young female professionals on my staff. And if I hear them say the word sorry, up, up, up, yeah, you know, get rid of that word.

Erica Rawls 21:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:00

Yeah.

Erica Rawls 21:01

Yeah. I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. No.

SPEAKER_02 21:05

Isn't it ironic of how our childhoods um really um is the foundation of the leader that we are? Because when you're talking about being the older, I'm thinking I had to let go of um because I want to hear the voices of people so much. Uh, one of the things I had to let go of is making sure that I set boundaries and I also didn't lead with emotion and feelings. Because I was a therapist for a lot of years, and I especially on the true personality color, I'm a blue. Uh, relationships are very important to me. Um, and one thing that's was difficult is as a CEO, you have to make decisions and you have to make prompt decisions. What's best for the organization and the mission and for the people around you. And I'm a being a blue, I'm an overthinker sometimes. I overthink. Not on every decision, but on decisions when it has to do with someone's feelings and emotions.

Erica Rawls 22:10

We're not talking analysis paralysis.

SPEAKER_02 22:12

We're talking we're the true colors personalities. Yes. And um so knowing that I'm an overthinker when it comes to emotions and and feelings, I've had to set boundaries for myself. Like when the decision comes, Amy, is this what's the six-month rule? Is it short term, is it long term? Give yourself three options, you know, like you know, move this along. Because I found myself thinking and overthinking about situations I didn't have time for. What if, yeah, and what if, what if should I do this? What if I don't? It's it's something that I had to work on and progress over the last five years and be confident in that, knowing that uh someone else's feelings and thoughts are at the top of my priority. Um but I also have to make a decision and communicate that decision and then be confident to move on and know that that it's the right thing.

Erica Rawls 23:12

Yeah, that's really good. So then one of the other things that I'm seeing a lot is people um they're they're now looking at performance, right? Over purpose. Like they think, okay, I want to do this thing over here, right? Because this is what's like in. So what are you gonna say to that person that knows that they're trying to fit into a box that they do not belong in, right? And just own their purpose, even though it's not, it may not even be popular. Um, because I see that a lot, and I'm just like, no, it's okay that you want to be a painter or whatever, right? You don't have to be, you know, this YouTube influencer, you don't have to be this, and that's not who you are. Like, own your your self-worth, own your values. Like, what do you say to that?

Boundaries, Feelings, And Decisive Leadership

SPEAKER_02 23:59

Throughout my career being a leader, my purpose has changed at different stages. And but that's only what led me to be sitting in the seat and being able to serve my community. Um, I started as a recreation therapist. I I worked in inpatient psych and then I went to Masonic Village. I wanted to work in re in rehab. And when I got there, uh the organization was going through a transformation. They really wanted to focus on the health and wellness of their staff. So I adapted and evolved, and I was like, I want to be a part of that.

SPEAKER_03 24:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 24:36

My purpose was I want to create community health organ health programs that's gonna help the individuals where I work. So I went on for my master's degree and got my master's at um at Penn State and Harrisburg, and then my purpose changed because God gave me twins. I already had a little girl at home, and then all of a sudden, you know, I said, we're having two. And my purpose at that time, um, especially, you know, being faced with um some medical diagnoses, that my it was okay to set aside something that I worked for for so long. I had just graduated with my master's degree, excited about my career, and then my purpose changed. And I stayed home with my girls and I became a mom uh full time for five years. Um, was it the most challenging times of our life? It really was, but I knew my purpose was that at that time to be home. And then I knew it was time to go back, and I I tried to figure out where is my purpose. I went back into impatient working with child and adolescents, and I started to see routinely our kids being discharged with no support or needed added support at home. And that's when I found Big Brothers, Big Sisters, and I found my purpose. I I create positive relationships for kids that that need a village, parents that need a village of support. So I preach finding purpose. I love what I do every day. Yeah, I have the opportunity, and I always say it's a privilege and honor to lead this mission, but I challenge women to find that and and understand that in your whole journey and when you get to the the age that I may be, that you can say, my purpose might have changed throughout, but that's what creates.

Purpose vs Performance And Career Evolution

Erica Rawls 26:33

When you stopped and you you said, Okay, I'm gonna raise my my twins, and then okay, I'm gonna back go back in the workplace. Like I would have some, I know I would have some fear. Like, okay, I've been out of the you know workplace for how many years? Yes. And then now I want to go back and start working, like okay.

SPEAKER_02 26:51

Fearful and and trying to find my place because I had my my vision for my career before the family shift. Uh, I remember my first job after the being home was with the Pennsylvania Psychiatric Institute. And I had sent my resume in multiple times, and I'm like, I know I'm qualified. So for viewers, you gotta be persistent. I actually, I'm old school. I showed up, I found the HR office, I knocked on the door, and I walked in with my resume, and I said, I know that there's a gap in my resume, but I know that I'm qualified. And at that moment, I went in for a behavioral health specialist position, which I know I was qualified for an adjunct therapist. She sent me right upstairs, and I left that day with two jobs. See? And so I love it because you can because I can. And I was like, I'm not leaving because I know I'm qualified. Yes. Um, so it's it's about having the confidence and feeling brave to step out into a situation that was it a little uncomfortable. It was, but I didn't let that show.

Erica Rawls 28:02

Yeah, yeah, that's really good. The question that you had, um, Mary, I thought it was really good. The walkout song. Yeah. You know, I had to think about that. So when I was I'd be ready for today. Okay. Yeah. So I would love for the two of you to share your walkout song and actually explain it too. Okay. Because I thought it was so good. So good.

Reentering Work With Courage

SPEAKER_00 28:23

Um, I'll connect the walkout song very quickly if I can, um, with Amy's story to say from a purpose perspective, and I love how you talked about the evolution of purpose. Um, anyone who knows me knows I'm a quote girly. I mean, go to any of my social media channels. I'm all about influencing through others' words. Doesn't mean you know mine have the most impact. And my purpose has always been driven by Maya Angelou's. People will forget what you said, they'll forget what you did, but they'll never forget how you made them feel. That has been the consistency of my purpose, even if it shifted or changed. The roles, the career pathing, the role, the flow, all of it. If I leave people feeling better off than they were before we met or interacted, my purpose is fulfilled. My prayer every day. Right there. So, Maya, thank you. And then cannot take credit, always give credit where it's due. Young woman that I had the opportunity to listen serve on a panel back in the spring at a women's conference. She said, as I'm preparing for, you know, whether it's a staff meeting, whether it's something like this, where she's on the stage in front of 900 attendees, um, or anything in between there, she said, I shake and I tremble and I'm nervous. And then I think about my walk-on song. I'm going up on stage. What song would I ask them to play to be my walk-on song? And immediately I'm standing a little taller, my shoulders are back, I took a deep breath. I'm like, wait a minute, I've got this because I've got my walk-on song. So I shared for a very long time my walk-on song was Michael Jackson's Man in the Mirror. That's good. Which I think goes right back to what I just shared as my purpose statement. You know, it starts with you. You can't have anyone advocate for you if you won't advocate for yourself. You can't make change happen in the world or expect other people to do good if you're not doing good. And if you're not putting that out there, and that's the energy and light, you know, that you share with others. So Man in the Mirror, hands down, drove my purpose for a very long time. And then shifted that as a CEO, um, and especially as the first female CEO of Whitaker Center for Science and the Arts here in, you know, our capital city in its 25, 26 year history, it's now Alicia Keyes, Girl on Fire. I love it. I love it. I'm on fire for my family to show my 22-year-old daughter that if she wants those three letters next to her name when she's going through her career pathway, take them. This girl is on fire for the young women who are on my team also, for other young women in the community, for our community. Yes. Because our community here in Harrisburg is not as healthy as it should be. So this girl has to be on fire leading one of our community assets, the anchor of Whitaker Center for Science and the Arts, is going to help working with the mayor's office and all of our state and local leaders to bring Harrisburg back to where it deserves to be. And I've got to be on fire every step of the way. So that's my walk-on song. That's good.

Walk-On Songs And Owning The Room

SPEAKER_02 31:34

That is so good. I cannot say that any better. Yeah, so I just did a check. Do you have a walk-on song? Did you think about it? Yes, my walk-on song. I was asked when West Short Um Chamber asked me when I walked up on stage, they asked for a walk-on song, and that was the first time I ever thought of it. But I mentioned it throughout this whole time with you ladies. It's important. Um, my walk-on song is Brave by Sarah Borellis. Okay. And um, it's all about self-expression and empowerment. Say what you want to say. Even if your voice shakes, you say what you want to say. And uh I had an opportunity two years ago at our national conference to uh listen to Brene Brown Dare to Lead. And I I resonated a lot with her because she does talk a lot about vulnerability and transparency and how to use um those personal correspondents to lead. And I really felt like you ever sit in an audience and you're listening to a keynote and you're like, oh my gosh, they're talking directly to me. Right. That is me. And um, so you know, I would say my walk-on song, every time I had to have to make one of those tough decisions, um, our I run Big Brothers, Big Sisters, South Central PA. Uh, our families that come to us for support, they have to be brave because that is their children, that is their livelihood. They're coming to us for more support, to to bring really, in essence, a stranger into their child's life to help support them. That takes a lot of bravery. Our volunteers that step up, you know, to meet a child and really become that positive role model, they have to be brave. And so when I think of the families and the people that I lead, um, I figure, you know, I'm just gotta be brave and step up and do things, you know, that I make myself on fire, you know, and and make those decisions and be brave and move forward.

Erica Rawls 33:37

That is so good. All right, Erica. What's yours? I know it's your role. So I had time to think about it. So mine is um Jill Scott, um, living life like it's golden. Yeah. Yeah. Because honestly, I feel like I was put on earth just to do that. And along the way, bring people with me. So, yeah, along the lines on this girl's on fire and man in the mirror, you know what I mean? It's just the same thing. But yeah, I even have it as my Instagram song. I was like, what would be my song? I was like, Erica, that's a no-brainer. Yeah, literally have it as my theme song. So, because I truly believe that everyone is put on her earth to live the best life. Okay. Like, you know what I mean? The best version of themselves. And if I can guide people to figure that out, it's a great life. Yes, absolutely. Yeah, it's golden. So thank you all for having coffee with me.

SPEAKER_00 34:25

I know we didn't. We didn't even get the chance to cheers. Cheers. Absolutely.

Erica Rawls 34:31

A wonderful morning. Yeah, I'm I'm excited about it. I really am. The countdown is on.

SPEAKER_00 34:37

The year of the horse, galloping in. Yes, yes, it's gonna be the year of the horse. Yeah, is it really? 2025 is the year of the snake, so it's your opportunity to shed what you do not want to take forward with you.

Erica Rawls 34:49

Do y'all hear this?

SPEAKER_00 34:50

And 2026 is the year of the horse, so gallop forward in the life that you want.

Erica Rawls 34:55

That makes so much sense. Yes, this year I've shed so much stuff.

SPEAKER_00 35:00

Yep, yep. Lord, yeah, Jesus. Yep. A couple more weeks. A couple more weeks. And get ready.

Erica Rawls 35:09

No, it's okay. I shed it enough. Oh, we shed it enough. Thank you for bringing so many gems and so much value to our. Thanks for the invitation. Yeah, yeah. So I have an assignment, y'all. If you like this, could you please share it with someone? Because we want nothing more but to grow with more individuals just like yourself that are looking to be mentored, to be filled up, to actually be heard and to be seen. This is this is it right here. This is the channel you want to lock into. So, yeah, stay tuned for more.

SPEAKER_00 35:39

All right, literal air job. Oh, I love that.

SPEAKER_02 35:45

I didn't know you had a swear jar.