Coffee With E

Turning Pain Into Purpose: Tiffiney Hall’s Story of Survival, Faith & Impact

• Erica Rawls

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🕊️ In this deeply moving episode of Coffee with E, we welcome Tiffiney Hall, a woman whose story will both break your heart and lift your spirit.

Tiffiney was recently named the 2025 Remarkable Woman of Central PA by ABC27 NEWS and Nexstar Media. But before the red carpet and national honors, she was a survivor of intimate partner violence… stabbed seven times in an attack that nearly took her life.

Now, she’s using her platform to speak out, heal others, and show that healing is not just possible, it’s powerful.

🎙️ In This Episode:

• Her raw, emotional account of surviving domestic violence
• The remarkable twist: how her daughter nominated her in secret
• What healing really looks like even 20 years later
• Building A Positive Place for survivors in Harrisburg
• Launching PosiTiff and learning to walk in purpose
• Why some women stay, and why judgment must stop
• A call to action: how The Phoenix Foundation is stepping in

✨ “You didn’t lose, we all won.” This episode is about resilience, faith, and women showing up for each other.

📢 Help us amplify stories like Tiffiney’s.. share, subscribe, and send this to someone who needs to hear they are not alone.

🔗 Sponsored by:

Top Construction • Rob Shaw – Allstate Insurance • Chavis Law Firm • Dirty Dog Hauling

🏡 Supported by The Erica Rawls Team & The Phoenix Foundation

#RemarkableWomen #TiffineyHall #DomesticViolenceAwareness #WomenEmpowerment #FaithAndHealing #SurvivorVoices #PodcastForWomen #CoffeeWithE



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Erica Rawls:

Hey you, welcome to another episode of Coffee with E. We had the pleasure of sitting down with Tiffany Hall. She was just named 2025 Remarkable Women in Central PA area. She had the opportunity to sit down and have conversation with Jennifer Hudson. She was able to go to California and got the red carpet treatment and she's able to share with us sit down first time after winning the award to discuss how she got it, why she received it. You know what Her story is not going to disappoint. She was able to turn her pain into purpose. Sit back, listen and hopefully it will be able to feed your soul. Welcome, tiffany. Thank you, I was so happy to be having coffee with you. Thank you, you are so welcome. You're so welcome.

Erica Rawls:

So I actually this is my first time actually meeting you in real life. Yes, so I see you on social media all the time. Yes, and I see that you're doing great work and most recently known for being the remarkable woman of central PA or Pennsylvania. So what it is is I was the 2025 remarkable women winner for this area. Yes, yes, so for, like ABC 27 news so it is their. Their broadcasting network, so there's like 125 nationwide is sponsored by next star media. Next star media is the largest broadcasting network in the world or in the nation, so ABC 27 is one of their networks. So in our viewing area, I was chosen as the 2025.

Erica Rawls:

So what? How does it feel? What does it? What does this mean for you? You knew our viewing were remarkable. Right, that's what it is. You just got the official yeah, but when you go to Hollywood right, when you go to Hollywood and they just like really focus on making sure that you know you're remarkable. So they sent 125 of us out to Hollywood for two days and we didn't have to lift a finger, like they planned everything. There was a remarkable man. Listen, it was. It was purple, it was purple Carson, it was purple, but it was life changing. And just being able to see women from all walks of life who we've all been through something and we've taken that pain and turned it into a purpose Wow, you know. And just coming to a point where it's like I wasn't the only one, like you know that but just to see that being celebrated on that level, because that's one of the things that we don't do as women we don't celebrate the remarkableness in other women the way we should, you know.

Erica Rawls:

So you got locally the local winner, should you know? So you got locally the local winner. You got a thousand dollars. And then there was like regional winners, they got five thousand each, and then there was an overall national winner and they got twenty five thousand dollars being. Did we, did we get twenty five thousand? No, we didn't.

Erica Rawls:

But I'm gonna tell you the award ceremony again, it was just ironic because you didn't feel like you lost. Of course not, you didn't. Yeah, just ironic because you didn't feel like you lost. Of course not, you didn't lose. Yeah, yeah, yeah, like you didn't feel, there was this whole award ceremony. It was on ABC. It's aired a couple of times now, but you were in that room, in that energy. In that room, deborah Cox performed oh, that's nice, yeah, so you didn't feel like you lost anything. You felt like we all won. You were being celebrated for the remarkable woman that you already knew. You were yes, yeah, so, and again, we don't do that like we should. No, we don't, we don't. So then, in order to be a remarkable woman, did you have to overcome something? Yes, so, and my daughter nominated me for this in particular. Oh, wow, that is great. My daughter is 24. So she nominated me for this last year. Okay, so I've known since January but we had to keep it a secret what we had to keep it a secret. And it's funny because this is the first interview that I've done like revealing this process.

Erica Rawls:

Yes, my husband he's still in the coffin with me. My husband is a basketball coach, high school basketball coach. He's an assistant basketball coach, okay, and they had a game up in state college and he got sick up in state college so he went to the ER. I didn't go to the game. So my daughter calls. He took an ambulance to the hospital and my daughter calls and she's like you know, he's going to the hospital.

Erica Rawls:

I was like wait, so 1030 at night, I'm driving up to State College. Me and my daughter had lunch plans the next day. Yeah, and we had started this thing like late last year we would pick a day we would go to lunch and we hadn't done it yet, you know, in 2025. So I was like, ok, maybe she just wants to be with mom, because mom's cool. She's like we're going to lunch tomorrow 12 o'clock. I was like cool. But then with that we got home 3.30 in the morning. I made him a doctor's appointment at like 12.15. So my daughter's like we can't go to lunch. Now I was like, oh, you want to go to lunch with me? That bad, we'll go afterwards. Wait, not Hal's dad. No, no, no, we're not worried about him. Yeah, we're not worried about him. But you know, I was like, well, we can go after his doctor's appointment, yeah. And she was like, never mind. I was like, oh, excuse me, we were at the doctor's.

Erica Rawls:

Erica, my daughter, calls, and she's like I have to tell you something. And she was like, remember that Remarkable Women nomination? She said you won and they were going to surprise you. Well, thank God they didn't, because I looked. I didn't look like this. That was essentially what a surprise is. Oh, my god, promise you are. It was a mess. Yeah, y'all would have been like she's remarkable. Who, like it was? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So it kind of worked out.

Erica Rawls:

But she ended up having to tell me because they needed the content by April 1st. So they needed all the announcements, all of you know, everybody notified so that they could do this big reveal April 1st. Ok, so I had to go to the studio, so I walked into ABC studio and they're like do you know why you're here and I'm like sort of kind of because I hadn't processed it all, I hadn't processed it at all. So was this your largest, I guess, win that you've had this day, or recognition, I should say, because it's you know what I mean. They're just recognizing you for the work you've already been doing. So that, but some of the things that have led up to that. So last year I spoke at the Washington Mall. So up to that, so last year I spoke at the Washington mall. So how I ended up here? Because you're like, I ended up in all these spaces In June of 2005,.

Erica Rawls:

I was a victim of intimate partner domestic violence and I was stabbed seven times by the person I was in a relationship with. So at that time I stepped out, I started speaking and I wasn't speaking from a hill space. There was a point where, for people who know about domestic violence, even after the incident happened, we reconciled, right, you know, and I would tell people I wasn't crazy, like he did go to jail, you know, like I wasn't where. Oh my God, I love him, he can't go to jail. I was like no, you tried to kill me, right, you know, you got to go to jail, whatever you know the worldly law said. But then there was a spiritual piece of me. We had this relationship. We were, you know, growing this family, so those emotions were there. You know that love was there and that's something that can't be explained.

Erica Rawls:

Hey, I'm hoping you're enjoying this episode of Coffee with E. I had to take 30 seconds to share with you one of our sponsors for this episode Top Construction. They are premier construction company located in central PA, so if you live in Dauphin, cumberland, lancaster and Lebanon counties, you want to check them out. Not only are they reliable, they are reasonable and they get the job done. Now let's go back to the episode I stepped out.

Erica Rawls:

I started speaking and then I came to a point where I realized I wasn't necessarily speaking from a Hill space, so there could have been realized that about that, I think I was. I didn't, I wasn't in tune with what was going on with me, like I was doing so much at the time, I was involved in so much at the time, not to, as we look, as I look back now and I can, you know, call a thing a thing. It was that trauma, it was that pain, instead of dealing with the root cause of how did I end up in this space? Because now, that's not something that I would ever allow in my life, you know. So what about me at that time? Allowed this and even saying that to somebody, I take responsibility for the part that I played in that you didn't do anything and I'm like I didn't make him do what he did. But I also recognize that I was in a space at that time where I accepted some things in my life that I would never accept now. So that confidence, that self-esteem, knowing your value, knowing your worth so in a totally different space, that's where that healing comes about. It takes time for you to get to that point.

Erica Rawls:

I will honestly say there are some moments where I think I'm still in the process. Sure, I'm still in the process. I'm so glad you said that, because a lot of people think that, well, one, you don't look like what you've been through, right, right. And then a lot of people think, just because you don't look like what you've been through, that you don't sometimes slip back into, okay, feeling unsure, right, or, you know, a little unsettled, that's natural, that's natural, yeah, and recognizing it, yes, you know, like even with Remarkable Women saying this year is 20 years. June 22nd is 20 years since it happened and I turned 50 in April. So, just how, this is the year where it's like you know, I'm very spiritually grounded, very, you know me, and God just got what and I'll listen. And if he says do it, I'll do it. You know if it's a big risk. If he says do it, I'll do it. You know if it's a big risk. If he says do it, I'll do it.

Erica Rawls:

So as I sat and I just thought about this year Remarkable Women turning 50, this is 20 years. Oh, this is the year you're really supposed to use your voice, wow. So then I thought I was yeah, I thought I was OK, plot twist. I thought, plot twist, pivot. I thought I were Okay, plot twist. I thought, plot twist, pivot. So I ended up I go to Hollywood for two days. The very next week I turned 50.

Erica Rawls:

My birthday was Easter Sunday. The energy was so high. I was on this emotional, overwhelming experience. Yeah, how do you keep that going? Oh, right, okay. How do I mentally stay in Hollywood? How do I mentally stay on the dance floor, you know, at my 50th birthday party? So when you come down off of that what now? You feel empty. You feel empty.

Erica Rawls:

So, may being Mental health awareness month, I was like Tiff, you have to stop and figure out. What do you do now? Because in my mind ordinarily I'm going to take Remarkable Women and I'm going to leverage it Right and I'm going to pour into other women. But I didn't have that plan. I just had Remarkable Women, like I had, and processed it. So you know, so far in the month of May, I just took a step back and really processed it. Like I said, this is the first interview I've done since Remarkable Women, and I'm in a space now where I realize, okay, let's take this opportunity and let's pour into another woman. You know, let's really say to another woman that thing that you've been through once you heal from it, you have these big other opportunities. Do not shy away from them. Yeah, so I have a question for you, because our platform is always about not always but it's basically about, like, knowing who you truly are. Right, you're always evolving.

Erica Rawls:

So if I was to ask you today, like, who is Tiffany Hall? Not the remarkable woman, not the mom, right, who? Who is she? I'm a cheerleader of women. Ok, I am a cheerleader of women, and women have a hard time with that. I want to see the greatness in every woman with that. I want to see the greatness in every woman. You know, sometimes people say it and then they don't show up as that. That's Tiffany Hall.

Erica Rawls:

If I'm in a room with you, oh, I want to see the best and the brightest come out in you as a woman. It doesn't intimidate me for you to shine Right. You know, I want you like. I don't want you to hide behind any of that greatness. And when people feel that energy, you know what that does. I know what it is that I needed, when I needed it that I didn't get. And I want to be that for another woman and say, hey, I know you can make it through. Whatever it is you're going through, it's going to take some mindset shifts. It's going to take some accountability. It's going to take looking in the mirror and saying you're beautiful, but there's some ugly stuff about you, and being honest and pulling that ugly stuff up at the roots and saying I'm okay with that. I'm okay with saying that there was an ugly part of me or there was some unhealed parts of me, but I need to heal in order to become my best version of myself.

Erica Rawls:

What did that work look like for you, first and foremost? Oh my gosh, I am. I'm in the process of finishing up another book, so that that was one of the things. I love it. So you're an author, yes, yeah.

Erica Rawls:

So it was a shift there, because I'm a speaking coach. So I thought which the speaking book was done, beyond words is done, and I thought that that's what I was supposed to be doing. Had this, you know six city tour plan for the summer, which I am still doing, just shifted some things. And then that that space from, like I said, coming down off of Remarkable Women and then my birthday, that's what I had to do. I had to sit and I had to hear God say you know, this is what I want you to do. The direction you're trying to go is not me. I'm not telling you to do that. I'm telling you to leverage what I've given you.

Erica Rawls:

So I went back to a project that I started in 2024 and it's called. It Was All In my Mind and this project started out as originally it was going to be a compilation of survivors of domestic violence. There's stories and I was like, no, it needs to go another way. Before that, it needs to be me saying to women it's all in your mind, how do you get out of your head, how do you stop listening to the voices? And as I started writing that and I really like again, was honest with myself, I went back and it sounds so cliche. Again, was honest with myself, I went back and it sounds so cliche, but I went back to that moment.

Erica Rawls:

If my biological father was not present in my life, that was the first instance of me feeling a level of unworthiness. Oh, wow, tiffany, if I was. If I'm not enough as a woman right, wow, tiffany, if I'm not enough as a woman that my own, my other parent didn't want to be in my life from birth, then I'm not enough, yeah, yeah. And there's so many women, young women like yourself, that struggle with that and they end up in these bad relationships right, in these bad relationships, right, whether it's mental, physical or financial abuse that because of the lack of a father figure in their life, or even just a father figure we want to say a father, but a solid father figure that they do struggle with this. So, yeah, which is one of the reasons why we have this platform like to have these conversations. So how did you overcome that that? Okay, to get to the point where I'm unworthy to I am worthy of this thing Sitting down.

Erica Rawls:

So my dad passed away when I was eight months pregnant with my daughter. He passed away that February. I had my daughter at my. So I'm like eight, nine months pregnant, do any day. And because we didn't have a relationship, I didn't know, he again that it didn't come to me, you know, firsthand, as it normally would have for a child who has a relationship with their parents. And someone that he was in a relationship previously, that still was in contact with me, called me and they were like they just found your daddy in the house. I was like what? So I go to work the next day and my aunt called me, my dad's sister somehow, you know, got my information. She calls me and she's like we're going to the funeral home.

Erica Rawls:

So you know plan the service, you know come. I was like okay, oh yeah, so I go and I have a brother. My brother was there and we never really had a relationship and they're talking about you know the clothes he's gonna wear, the casket, all of this, and I remember my brother said he'll be, we'll put his green suit on him. And I was like and I remember I just started crying because when you think about a father-daughter relationship or you think about what it should be, I should have been the one who knew what suit my dad would have worn. That's something you know. I was the older one, I was the daughter, and I just remember sitting there crying like I didn't know this man. So then it was guilt, guilt, it was, it was guilt, but it was again that connection. I felt like you know, I didn't, I didn't know him. So you know, we're planning his, his funeral service, and I ended up I said I would read something and I remember reading this and that the repass people were coming up to me. They were like he didn't even know he had a daughter and I was like what? Wow, you know, but here I am processing it years later. So I came to a point. I went. I hadn't gone to his, his grave site, like when he was buried. That was it for me.

Erica Rawls:

So, going through this process, after the stabbing and that healing piece, I remember there was a day where and I don't know, just like I, just I can see it I was like we're going to my dad's grave site, taking my daughter and I was just like I didn't know where he was at. Like I knew the cemetery but I did not know where he was at. Like I knew the cemetery but I did not know where he was buried at. And I remember like oh my God, I don't know where he's at. I called a cousin, you know, she told me, and I got a newspaper and I sat there in the cemetery with my daughter and I released any strongholds that had on me because I had to forgive him.

Erica Rawls:

You have to forgive, you have to, yes, and I didn't want my kids feeling you know from my situation that they couldn't have that sort of connection, you know, with their dads or whatever. And I didn't want that bitterness or that angriness coming from me and also accepting that I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for that part of him, even though I didn't know it, and saying that in that moment and up until he died, he did what he thought was best, right, and that was not a reflection of me. There you go. That was his choice. So you let him and you also took the responsibility of allowing yourself to heal, yes, yes, and not being angry for you to move forward. Yeah, not being angry. No, you did what you needed to do, even though I didn't understand it, as you know your child, your daughter and that had nothing to do with my worthiness, you know. It had nothing to do with me not being enough for you. You did what you had to do and I had to be okay with that, no matter how I felt.

Erica Rawls:

And that's a hard pill to swallow, it is, that's a hard pill to swallow. And then you know, like you said, that father figure, I still have my uncle. You know my mom's oldest brother. I still have my grandfather. So I still had some amazing solid men in my life, sure Role models. Yeah, I just I didn't have that connection with my dad. You know, I still had and was raised on some solid values or family values, even though it wasn't from him. I still had that connection and really saying, if you still had it, you didn't have it from where you may have wanted it from, but you still had it.

Erica Rawls:

And looking at how that healed me as far as that male-female relationship, I'm married now. I've been married to the person I'm with for 10 years. I know what healthy looks like, yes, do we agree all the time? Hell, no. If he said, yes, I'm like Tiffany, you're lying, but you also have a relationship. But I understand, you know, just because that conflict may be there, I would be wanted at one time and say, oh, I'm out of this. You know, I ain't got this to do Right. One picture, sure, sure, there we go. I would be that person that would be like, oh, I'm out of this. But my husband was who I needed, you know, and deals with me in every capacity. Know I'm, I just turned 50, I'm coming to this menopausal aid girl.

Erica Rawls:

We can have a whole segment on that window, up fan, on blankets, up window. I feel so bad, it's time to get naked. Then let me put my lions up to close back on. It's a whole hot mess. It's literally a whole hot, flat mess. And I'm like this poor man, like you know, I'm turning the ceiling fan on, then I'm turning the ceiling fan off, and somebody to even go through that with you, yeah, oh, my god, it must be. They're a creeper, oh my gosh. Because I would like, if you don't put that window down, I'm, you know, sitting on the side of the bed at 3 o'clock in the morning window up, and he's just your emotions alone, just the emotion, just grass dry, bowed out and next you want to just love on you. That's just or. I'm like you know.

Erica Rawls:

I remember there was a time I was like I can't. I was like I can't do this, and then I realized every time I did that it was around cycle time, it was at PMS time and I had to learn. I was like, girl, if you don't get yourself together, and he'll be like where are you going? I don't know, I just can't do this marriage thing anymore. I did a blanket apology Like babe, you know what? I want to just say sorry, cause I don't know what's going to happen tomorrow. Tomorrow may be reckless, the next day I may be loving Just please, under me for who I am, because I don't know what's going on with me. I have no control, and being able to say that you know and like I, really I have no clue, so that makes a difference.

Erica Rawls:

I want to take two seconds to share with you that this particular episode is brought to you by Rob Shaw and All State Insurance. If you're looking for someone to give you insurance, whether it's home insurance, car insurance go to him. He is your guy. Thank you, rob, for sponsoring this show. You know, with all of the, you know the relationships like that you had and you know the broken relationship that you had and then deciding for yourself and for your daughter, right, that it was best for you to heal and let go so that she can have a better life too, yes, that is to be commended. That's remarkable in itself. You're welcome.

Erica Rawls:

And then to take something that happened to you that was so traumatic and to turn it into something that's so positive, that was just to be commendedended, but I want us to talk about positive. Sure, positive is in some building. Yeah, yeah, yes, even that. So that's literally my business name p-o-s-i-t-i-f-f. That's like literally how it's established and I think it's so sweet. That's what everybody said love it. So even when I did that, I shied away from it because I was like this is so dumb, right. And when I you know I established my bank account and all of that and you know I have people they're like, oh my god, I love it, love. And I was like what, and I had to grow into that. Yeah, you know, when I'm telling people, it's a play on the word positive and my name Tiffany, and they were like it makes sense, and I was like you like it. And now you know, the brand is the. The branding color is the trademark.

Erica Rawls:

I didn't, girl, I didn't. I didn't before we released this episode. You're gonna start the process. I didn't. Um, yes, I didn't, and that's what. That's what I'm so with positive and I'm not even gonna lie to you. It's's what I'm so with positive and I'm not even going to lie to you. It's something that I'm still building and I'm finding and I'm finding out along the way, like certain things, like I don't have this all figured out, like I tell people I don't have this all figured out. I had this idea, I took it, I decided to run with it and now I'm seeing where it's like sticking. Yeah, you know, people are like I love it.

Erica Rawls:

So now for me, even with me, you know, like I said, speaking coach, but I'm scaling as well. You know, I'm really growing into this and just like, really, you're figuring it out, growing into it. Like you know, people like positive, no, you know, or my daughter will be somewhere, and they're like aren't you Positive's daughter? And she's like, not Positive's daughter, she's like, but that's who you know she's known for. You're coming to bring it. Yeah, she's like, aren't you Mom? You're like calling me Positive's daughter, so yeah, so the brand is really evolving. So, yeah, the trademark and all of that, it'll be done. That's awesome.

Erica Rawls:

And don't you have a foundation? So I have a nonprofit and that's a positive place. So I literally have a location in Harrisburg, pennsylvania. That's home and at a positive place. It's about making trauma a positive experience. How do you make trauma a positive experience? Talk about it. Okay, my experience. Talk about it okay. And just like we said, making and creating a safe space for people to say I went through this, yeah, this is what this looked like, but I don't look like what I've been through and being able to share that with other people. So y'all listen but don't judge. We listen but don't judge, but then also holding one another accountable. So my story comes from being a survivor of domestic violence. I have a conference room. You know non-profits are welcome to come host groups there. You know that partnership piece. So it's not just about domestic violence. That's what I I do.

Erica Rawls:

What I've come to realize is, if you're not ready to leave, I can't make you leave. I can't make you leave. So when that person comes to me, that's the first question I ask Are you ready to leave, right? Yeah, I mean because a lot of people they'll leave, but then they'll go back. They'll go back. So I say, because I am local, born and raised in Harrisburg, I'm not in a space where, if you're going to be back and forth I'm willing to put, because I am a small business, you know, I'm not willing to put and jeopardize my safety, my husband's safety, my children's safety. Yeah, you know, because you're not ready to go.

Erica Rawls:

And then, next thing, you know, you know we're going through the process of you know, well, let's get you stable. What do you need once you leave? Right, and not a safe exit plan, because I tell people I wouldn't want somebody and not just women, anybody. A safe exit plan because I tell people I wouldn't want somebody and not just women, anybody. A safe exit plan. I wouldn't want to put anybody in a situation where you know you're leaving and then you're looking over your shoulder every time you're out and about, okay. Well, when you do that, no matter what um on the circumstances, if you're ready to leave, then you're gonna cut some things off.

Erica Rawls:

You know when you're ready to and again, that's just my opinion and that's from my experience, so I can't speak for anybody else's but when you're coming to me, are you ready? Are you ready to leave? Are you ready to do the work emotionally? Are you ready to do the work financially? Because when you leave, that may solely be you dependent on you, right? You know so all the way around. Are you ready to leave? And if you're not ready to leave, then I'm okay with that. Yeah, you know, I'm okay with that. I'm not going to make you leave anything. And that's that non-traditional piece, right?

Erica Rawls:

So sometimes we've seen organizations where, traditionally, okay, you're a victim, you got to go, yeah, and they're putting this a victim, you got to go, and they're putting this plan in place for you to go. And that, looking over your shoulder, you left in the middle of the night. You know you're on the run and this person is looking for you, but if you're ready to leave, you're going to make some different decisions. You know you're going to put some different things in place. And again, that's just my opinion. Sure, and I believe, right, and I think that comes from doing the internal work. You know saying, you know, like I had to do, I don't, I deserve better. So how do you let's talk to that, that woman or that person that's in that domestic violence situation and they have come to the end of their rope. But they may be thinking, okay, am I truly ready to leave? How do you know you're ready to leave when you can walk away and say I'm never going back, when you can walk away and say I know I deserve more, I deserve better.

Erica Rawls:

So when this, uh, when this happened to me, I was a cna, so I'm a nurse, I'm at rpn and even financially there was a difference. Shortly, y'all want to say, oh, you're going to love this. It happened in June. I lived in an apartment complex. I started searching for a house. Oh, wow, I started searching for my first house. Yeah, I closed on my first house, not even a year On your own, on my own. That's I just yeah, I knew you'd appreciate that I closed on my first house. That's awesome. So I moved from this apartment complex to my first home and it was just me and my kids and just feeling like that stability was needed right, and that sense of ownership and that pride, because you know I worked to do this. You know still as a yeah.

Erica Rawls:

But then got in a situation in the house where, when I went back to work, I had a resident that grabbed my arm and re-injured one of my wounds. So I ended up off and things just like spiraled out of control financially. And I was able to. I don't know if they still do this, but I was able to sell the house back to like after like four years. It's called like cash for keys. Yeah, so instead of foreclosure and all of that, I was able to sell the house back Foreclosure. Yes, so I was able to sell the house back house how I grew, how my kids grew, you know how, being rooted in something that was ours, from what we came from, right, it was totally different.

Erica Rawls:

Yeah, giving you that piece of independence, it does give you the confidence that you need, because one of the triggers or one of the red flags is financially. You get suffocated too when you're in abusive relationships. They control the finances as well as emotional and physical. So it's just yeah. So to see you overcome that and say, yep, no, I'm about to do this. And even with the setback, you still had the confidence to go out there and find the house to start all over to have a better life for you and your children, right, right. And then, yeah, to see how far you've come. So that's awesome. Big thank you to Sugaring NYC, harrisburg for sponsoring this episode. It's because of them we're able to bring this great content to you. Are you searching for a fabulous place that does lashes and eyebrows, that slay, or hair removal that just makes you feel so great you want to check them out.

Erica Rawls:

Now back to our show. And even, you know, with that leave in piece or with the stand piece not necessarily my story, but being able to stand in the gap for another victim, yes, who decided to stay because her husband abuser says. You know, she's been the homemaker for however long they've been together. She's been taking care of kids, he's been the sole financial provider and each and every day, you know, he comes home, something's triggering him and he's beating her right. So she decides, decides, I've had enough. But what she knows is he said if you ever try to leave me, I will kill you and these kids Fear. Yeah, how many times have we seen it play out in reality? Right, you know, a husband kills a wife and their children. So when you hear that, instinctively. What are you going to do? Yeah, you're going to stay. You're going to be afraid. You're going to stay. Yeah, stay out of fear, you're going to stay.

Erica Rawls:

So, having the courage and the wherewithal to have those conversations, you know, and make advocates on a bigger level aware of that and giving a voice to that woman who may have felt like you know, people are saying I stay because I want it or I'm weak. No, actually, I take strength to stay. Wow, because you're protecting your kids. Yeah, so your foundation allows them to have a safe space to come and to talk through, to get the courage. And this is after they left.

Erica Rawls:

This is after they left, yes, after they left, and they're not going back. They're not going back, yes, yes, saying, you know, I didn't stay because I was weak. I stayed because he was a good provider, despite what was going on, because two things can be true at the same time. It can be. And until we are in a space where we can have those courageous conversations, he might've been a pissy husband, but he was a good provider. I never had to worry about anything for my kids. If I would have left and had to do it on my own, my kids wouldn't have had. You know the things that they've had, whether that's good, bad or indifferent.

Erica Rawls:

What do we say? That's not for us to judge, right, it's not my place for me to judge why you stayed. Yeah, that's not my place to judge any decision that you've made in your relationship. You knew what was best for you at the time and it's not for me to question. It's not for anybody you know else to question.

Erica Rawls:

And again, processing that trauma and getting out of it and saying you may have stayed because you thought you personally thought you didn't have the strength to lead, but saying to you as a woman do you know how strong you were for staying? Right, yeah, I think what comes to mind for me is a lot of people think that the woman that's staying isn't a career woman. There are women that have high positions that are in the same state of affairs, right, they're going home, they're presenting themselves as if they have it all together and they go home and they're actually broken and they're also being broken by the hands of their perpetrator. So what do you say to that woman? Because I think a lot of it has to do with there is a little pride, as in yeah, I can't let people know what I'm going through for the fear of being judged right or not accepted or because they have to put on this air or this fake identity, right? So what would you say to that woman? Because you know they're out there.

Erica Rawls:

I have a very, very good friend of mine and hers was more emotional than it was anything else physical. Hers was more emotional than it was anything else physical and she held a very C-suite position, like she was very up there, you know, in what she did in education and post-secondary education. And she had an incident where she was just like I had to go in here every day and still do my job, okay, well, where do you make space to process mentally what you're going through? Right, and why don't you leave Right, right, yeah, right, and I'm like I don't know what else to say. So why don't you leave Right, and that's what right? So here she was, like years after the fact, and she and I were talking and just saying to her you did what you thought was best for you at the moment.

Erica Rawls:

And how do we incorporate, make those safe spaces, you know, because as women we're expected to go to work, nothing's wrong. Still handle, nobody ever asks are are you okay? That's fair, that is, are you okay if you're an executive? If you're an executive, you got it all together. But knowing that you need those safe spaces too, and I found that in like different conferences and retreats that I've been to, they're the women that you'll hear talk the most right because they're in, they're safe, right, you know. And then you're fine. You find out like they're the women that you'll hear talk the most Right Because they're in, they're safe, right, you know. And then you're fine. You find out like they're second in command, you're like, right, but they didn't have that safe space and it was so freeing for them.

Erica Rawls:

And when we, as women, understand and allow, without judgment no matter where you are, judgment, no matter where you are that you can say what you need to say. You can say I'm hurting, right, I didn't have this all figured out, and we're not going to say, oh well, you know, you're the CEO of whatever, okay, from the CEO to the custodian, like you said, there's no difference. No difference. We can't think, because you appear on the outside to dress it up, right, that you're any better than the person who you know isn't dressing it up, or we see. So just making that space. I believe that's the the the thing that, moving forward, we need to see more. Uh, making space for somebody to say I'm not okay. Okay, I'm not okay. Well, at this moment, we'll give you your space to not be okay. Right, you know, it's okay to not be okay. You don't have to be, you know, have your cape on all the time, be strong all the time. And having women who understand like I've been there and it's okay. Right, it's okay, it is okay.

Erica Rawls:

Yes, just in case you don't know, these episodes are brought to you and funded majority from my real estate team, the Erica Ross team. So thank you for continuing to support this channel and if you're looking to sponsor in any way, one of the best gifts you can give us is a referral. So if you know anyone that's looking to buy or to sell, reach out to us. We are here to help. So it is my prayer that anyone that feels as though they are in an unsafe place whether it's physical, emotional, financial or otherwise that they have the courage to leave, and to leave for good. That they are worthy enough to live the life that God has designed for them. That is my prayer every day.

Erica Rawls:

So it's because of that we actually we have a foundation that's rolling out, the Phoenix Foundation, and that's to help people that have finally found a safe space and want to build up. You know their financial independence. We give them grants for suitable housing, whether it's rent or for purchase of a home, and so when we heard your story and Remarkable Women and why you were named Remarkable in your story, it was just like wow, we had to sit down and have a conversation with you. So, of course, then when we talk to you offline to see how we can actually align our spaces or our missions, to see how we can make it a better place, at least for Central PA to start, who knows where God's going to take it. And, ironically, here we are again. Because what did I just say? I just remembered talking to you. Yeah, I purchased my first home even six months after it happened. So being able to say, erica, how do I become that, that face for your foundation, how can I? I support? Because I know what it was like and I, I literally I passed by the house that I bought um a million times because, because I lived on, didn't you get emotional?

Erica Rawls:

Because it had 13 steps up in the front. Oh, wow, I was like I don't want that house. I was like I don't want that. Who is going up all these steps? And I kept passing it by. I was like, yeah, the first time my realtor. He's like, just look at it. I was like I don't want that house. And I walked in that house and it was moving ready, see, and he told me this house was empty for almost two years. He said this is your house. Wow, no, it's just like, oh, that's the house I ended up in, yeah, and I just parked out back and I went up the basement steps it wasn't 13 steps, but I just yeah.

Erica Rawls:

And where I lived at, we had a space in between my house and my neighbor's house. That was a mom and her daughter, then it was another mom and her daughter, then there was a guy who you know, he lived by himself, and then there was another mom and her son and we created community. Wow, During the holidays we would like, you know, bring our cookout stuff out and we would do something together. It was like the women of Hell Avenue, the women of Hell Avenue, the women of Booster's Place, but Hell Avenue, yeah. So we, just, we became our community. So and, ironically, I was the matron of honor for the young woman who lived next door to me when she got married, so that's important. You know, then, where I grew in that house.

Erica Rawls:

So anything I can do for you, your foundation, I look forward to it. Thank you so much. This was so great Y'all. If you agree, I need you to do me a favor. I need you to comment because we want to have conversations with you. We want to make sure we tag Tiffany Hall here so that you can actually have conversations with her individually. And yeah, thank you so much. Thank you, thank you, I appreciate you. Yeah, likewise, and we look forward to seeing you in the comments.

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